“Obviously, I’m not trying to win the approval of people but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant.” Galatians 1:10 NLT
For most of my life, I have been a people pleaser, trying to do things to get the approval of men, to my detriment.
As someone raised by a perfectionist mom and as the firstborn, I had to meet expectations and be an excellent example to my siblings, even from the age of 10. This meant not doing activities I wanted to do as a child all because I wanted a “thumbs up.”
A few years back, a childhood friend told me she always thought I was much older because I never played. I always just watched them play. She didn’t know that I desperately wanted to play, but I couldn’t because I didn’t want to get that cold stare.
People pleasing continued into my adult life, influencing how I worked with people. I was always the hardest worker and the most available.
I didn’t start to break free from it until I got burnt out, and God comforted me by showing me how to live regardless of the approval of men. It’s been an incredible three-year growth journey since my encounter.
Can we please both God and men through our work?
The answer is no. I say this frankly because the standards are different. God doesn’t require us to follow the rules to please Him. All He needs is faith, which means trusting Him no matter what.
But man is bound and influenced by laws, and to please another person, we must align with their laws, not ours. Do you see how crazy that is? It’s an impossible feat.
I have realised that when we decide to please God and do what He would have us do, the way He wants it, this action will filter the people in our lives.
When people see that we don’t care so much about their thoughts, they reduce their expectations and lower the parameters of being pleased.
Sometimes, pleasing God also ticks the right boxes for people. For example, to please God, we start showing love and praying for those we work with. This will show in how we take an interest in them. And there’s nobody on earth who doesn’t appreciate some extra attention and timely conversations.
But pleasing men doesn’t tick any boxes for God. People pleasing becomes an idol that we choose over God because we’d rather worship man than do God’s will. Do you see the difference?
“I live to please God.”
Are you a people pleaser or a God pleaser? Whose approval do you want?
People pleasing is the enemy’s way of diverting our attention from what matters.
Leave a Reply