“For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.” Proverbs 23:7 NKJV
We have a gazillion thoughts that go through our minds daily. Some of them are good; some are pure; some are dirty (yes, admit it); some are evil; some are holy, and so on. With this multitude of thoughts, should we then say that we are everything we think about? If the answer is yes, then that’s a lot of personalities in one person. Too confusing.
I recently got to understand that between thought and action, there is a gap. For some, the gap is wide and they’re conscious of it. For others, the gap is small and uncontrollable. What you do in that gap is important. I’ll explain.
Our life experiences from childhood to date give us default thoughts that are automatic. For example, if something from your past made you an easily angered person, your default thought will trigger that anger when an event occurs. If you grew up with so much love and affection, it’s possible that when the same event occurs, your default thought will not trigger anger but compassion.
After that default thought, a man who lacks self-control will move from default thought to action in microseconds. From our example, we will be quick to say that the person who expresses his anger is one that lacks self-control. But from our second example, if the person with compassion cannot influence that default thought, it is also a lack of self-control because sometimes, showing compassion may not be the appropriate action.
Your inability to influence your default thought before it becomes action shows you need to boost your self-control muscles. And from our focus scripture, this is when you become your default thought.
But there’s something I call “secondary thought”. This thought is conscious and comes into your mind to replace the default thought.
Going back to our example, if your default thought triggers compassion but you pause and ask yourself, “is compassion the appropriate response right now or do I need to correct this wrongdoing sternly but lovingly?” You have just introduced a secondary thought that can then become your resultant action. From our focus scripture, you have become your secondary thought, because of self-control.
As you exercise your self-control muscles over time, the speed at which secondary thought replaces default thought will become faster. Your default thought can trigger anger but in split seconds, you’re hugging your colleague because a secondary thought of peace-making replaced it.
Working differently requires a massive dose of secondary thoughts because you’re rewriting many default thoughts in your mind. It’s not easy and early on, it may look like you’re slow to act. But as they say, “practice makes perfect.”
Today’s Task: Try to consciously identify your default thoughts today by pausing. That’s the first step to strengthening your muscles.
Leave a Reply